two in a day. cool.

"you're so cool imma call you a culo." that's a line from "la raza" by Kid Frost. i remember my dad laughing at that line when i was in like 3rd grade. he laughs from his gut. those are the best laughs. the most contagious laughs. i don't have a laugh like that. most people don't. anyway, my uncle who lives in california gave my dad the cassette single who then gave it to me. I think it was my first rap tape outside of vanilla ice.

i wrote this last night and just found out Kid Frost was diagnosed with cancer. i had some personal stuff in this post, but nothing i had to say is nowhere near as important as his battle. many blessings to Kid Frost.

expectations

when you're young, you have a mental image of what being an adult is like. when you're older, that mental image doesn't really go away unless you're already there. i thought by now i'd have a family of my own, living in a different city, working for who knows. i'm not there yet. if i could go back and tell my younger self to do things differently, i most definitely would. i'd try to make sure i met the expectation i had for myself. i'd tell myself to stay away from certain girls, don't waste your time in art school and just go to niu, look for a better job in sf and STAY THERE. but i can't and have to live with certain disappointments.

disappointments are a funny thing though. the only reason people get them is b/c of expectations. i used to date a girl who said she didn't have expectations from people other than herself... that way, she would live without disappointment - i didn't believe her. i just can't imagine not expecting. it's hard to not expect certain things out of the people you're closest to. even little things. i think it's fair to expect people to care about something you've worked hard at trying to build even if it doesn't interest them. but then again, if they care about you, it should interest them b/c it's something you made. every ounce of it is YOU. so why shouldn't they care about it, unless they really don't care about you. or maybe they're just too caught up in their own world. idk. sometimes people are selfish.
i try to show interest in letting my friends and family know i want them to succeed in what they love. from listening to what they have to say, reading their scripts, giving feedback on their music, listening to their monologues, down to the smallest notions of liking a post on facebook. i have a friend who runs a business crafting leather goods. he seems to really love it! i don't really buy leather products if i have a choice, but i try to show my support in any way i can. it's the most amazing thing when people have a dream and go for it. the older i get, the more i realize it takes the people around you to support your ideas and dreams even if it's not their thing. without their support, the starting point feels as dismal as the end game. MY POINT IS: support your loved ones in what they love. almost everyone has a dream. maybe they don't come out and say what their dream is b/c they're afraid of failure, but support their passions anyway. those passions are where their dreams hang out.

speaking of supporting your friends, here's some music my friend made. perfect for zoning out, yo!

Time to find a new job

i know i just started a new job, but eff... Kind of want to be done smelling like my job when i go home.

here's some piano music for when you're tired of complaining



ikotu - I II III IIII EP

happy brandon boyd day

It's true brandon boyd of incubus changed his bday to mine b/c i got it like that. but for real, i don't have it like that. fooled you guys for a minute. for real for real, it's been a really nice, chill day. slept in, had breakfast/lunch and coffee with my lovely girrrl, and i'm about to watch the bachelor a little later. taking it back to the days of living in a sacramento burb, watching sean lowe deal with his season of mostly down to earth ladies (and one crazy). i don't know anything about this season. all i want is drama for these people. it's like staring at the aftermath of a car accident. you hope no one gets hurt, but you can't look away, b/c it's not something you see everyday... it's not even something you want to see.
anyway, i'm hoping the rest of 34 feels like the past few days in the approach to this age. chill, fun, lovely... and a little bit of excitement from stealing a rose for my valentine. proflowers effed up my order, so i had to steal something. i don't feel bad about it.
so to keep me and everyone in that lovely, chill mode, i suggest Yoh the Shaolin's "Tales Over Tea." think 90's rap, meditative flows, and the best of vibes.



Yoh the Shaolin - Tales Over Tea

just another day (in the neighborhood) - Queen Latifah.

but there is something different about coming into the new year. it's like starting fresh, you know? who doesn't like fresh? dirty mofos don't like fresh. gross, right? don't be a dirty motha-fatha. showers are nice. bathing is always dope... which reminds, i need to wear deodorant waaaay more often. idk, sometimes i just forget and then it's too late. i'm out and about and i smell like a damn onion. not fresh.

consider devin malek your daily deodorant and keep your ears as far away from an aural onion. check the video and track right hurrr:


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